Monday, July 17, 2006


I actually drove the other day with the girls, and with the exception of a little wrong turn, we arrived at the intended location. The girls and I are trying our best to fend off listlessness, as there are not many things to do besides shop and we've been sightseeing for more than three weeks now. The irony is that we have nothing but time now, but as soon as the furniture comes and it is time to unpack, they will be entering school.

At the risk of repeating what may have been written in my family's blogs, we had an interesting weekend. I really try not to repeat, which is the cause of my irregular postings, but you've got to hear about this amazing wedding we attended on Saturday!
We attended a Malay wedding this weekend at the home of one of our new neighbors. What an event! They blocked the street off and covered its entire length with canopies and an endless stretch of banquet tables. The food was traditional Indian/Malay food, which is eaten with the fingers, not forks, and had a healthy kick to it. The colors and smells and sounds were fantastic, complete with traditional 'kampung,' or drummers that were unbelievably loud for their number. Everything happens outside here, even weddings, and although we were hot (about 90*F), there were happy people everywhere and more food than you could shake a stick at! There was a shuttle service set up and traffic 'polis' around the neighborhood to alleviate the traffic of an estimated 1000 guests, guys on walkie talkies wearing the coolest outfits ever, and about 20 greeters helping the parents host the wedding on the block. As a bonus, we met all our neighbors at once, among whom is a dog-loving ISKL teacher, Karen. It is possible the girls will have her as a teacher sometime during high school. Pretty amazing.

A funny thing here is the common greeting given by Malaysians; just like we say, 'hi, how are you,' they say 'hello, have you eaten?' We were encouraged to eat so many times my Grandmother would have shed a tear! Oh, and the wedding party (all Malay wedding parties) wear purple. Guests do not; it is the only way to tell who is who. We were four of five caucasians there and although we stick out, we're all getting used to being objects of interest amongst the natives. I guess I understand because I still remind myself not to stare when I see nothing but a pair of eyes behind the traditional black Arabic robe or the brightly colored headscarves and full-length dress of the Muslim women. I think I am just more subtle in my people watching! For some great pictures, see Greg's blog dated July 15.
Again, it is deceptive to think that because the locals are friendly and speak English that they live in the 'same world' as we do. I guess we will notice the sublties by and by, but it takes much thought to communicate in ways that steer clear of religious or political differences. Today I made a comment about beef to a Hindu (oops)- he didn't take offense, but I felt like an insensitive cad. The learning curve is still steep.
For now, we will pay attention to the experience of being a minority, foreigners, guests in someone else's country, and remember our manners. Beginning Bahasa Malayu lessons will be very helpful in basic communication, but even learning some basic cultural things will help. For instance, anyone older than you is pleased to be called 'Aunty' or 'Uncle,' as it is a polite term of respect and more personal than a first name or Mr. such-n-such. Also, the handshake is a bit weak here because it is really a 'salaam,' or a gentle brush of the hand and then a reference to one's heart to show sincerity. Understanding food is also a way to gain a little respect, especially when we shun the western fork and knife in favor of the local manner. Eating with our hands is pretty messy at first, but seems to show that we are open to the culture and respect it.
I find myself even more proud of my American-European heritage. Flipping through the channels the other day, I was surprised to find myself listening to a symphony and being glad it was a composer I recognised, reminded of how beautiful and rich our roots are as Americans. I am appreciating things more and more about home, but for now will be a good houseguest in Asia. As long as we can have an occasional 'American Night,' I think we'll be fine.


chryl left the ground at 23:41 2 comments