Thursday, July 28, 2005

Ok, Already!

Ok, I get it. Either write something or get out of the way! This evening at New Community I was shocked when a family friend asked me if I had updated my blog since May 23. Equally shocked when Drew later said the same thing. Wow.

The latest trip to IL is for Leadership Summit training at Willow Creek. It was so great to be at this beloved place again, although mixed with sadness. Parking in the lot that faces the chapel yesterday, I just sat in my car and took a few breaths. You know the last time I looked at this parking lot. When I finally made myself get out 0f the car and walk up the path to the chapel, I almost felt that I was barging in on a story that had begun much earlier and my presence was an unwelcome interruption.

To look through the wide glass windows and think back to the lobby full of those who would lend their presence and a shoulder to lean on. Remeber the chill of a March day and the reluctant participation in a story that brought me to an unwelcome plot twist... to remember the faces of those who love. The picture of standing room only and faces from all tangents of my life was so surreal, especially with dear friends from California and Texas just coming to show a tangible proof of their love and devotion.

As I ended my training today, it was with reluctance that I walked the opposite direction back to my own reality. Am I glad that the newest memory will be mingled and layered with the last? Now this place that so recently held the agony of loss- the salty, sad, and unwelcome parting- this place now holds that with the spice of purpose, the pepper of slowly moving on, the essence of service, the taste of friendships yet to be forged, and the aroma of hoping and banking on the fact that my presence and contribution will make a difference in the world.

I don't really have a choice. But I guess in a small way I am.




chryl left the ground at 13:32 3 comments